Terms of Service
Last updated: October 19, 2026
1. Agreement
By using Allocationist (the “Site”), creating an account, joining the club list, or placing an order, you agree to these Terms and our Privacy Policy. If you do not agree, do not use the Site. This page is a practical template for an Alberta-based ecommerce brand; have a lawyer review it before relying on it in a dispute.
2. The Site & parody artwork
Allocationist sells limited parody apparel and related merch. Designs are original satire and commentary. They are not affiliated with, endorsed by, or sponsored by any third-party brand, league, or rights holder depicted or implied. Product photos, descriptions, and availability may change without notice.
3. Accounts
You are responsible for your login credentials and for activity under your account. Provide accurate information. We may suspend or terminate accounts that abuse the Site, attempt privilege escalation, scrape data, attack our systems, or violate these Terms. Admin and staff tools are for authorized personnel only.
4. Orders, pricing & payment
Prices are shown in USD or CAD depending on your region and may change. Placing an order is an offer to buy; we may decline or cancel orders for fraud, stock, pricing errors, or shipping limits. Payments are processed by our PCI-compliant payment provider. You authorize charges for items, taxes, and shipping you select. Wallet payments (Apple Pay / Google Pay) follow the provider’s terms as well.
5. Shipping & returns
Shipping methods, timelines, and fees are described at checkout. Risk of loss passes when the carrier receives the goods. Return and exchange policies, if any, will be stated on the Site or in order emails. Custom or limited drops may be final sale.
6. Club / newsletter
Joining the club or newsletter means you consent to receive marketing email from Allocationist until you unsubscribe. Transactional mail (orders, resets, account notices) may still be sent when needed to operate the service. Unsubscribe links are included on marketing messages.
7. Acceptable use
Do not misuse the Site: no unauthorized access, scraping at scale, injecting malware, attempting to alter another user’s data or your own privileges, abusing APIs, or using the Site for unlawful activity. We may rate-limit, block, or report abuse.
8. Intellectual property
Site content, branding, and original artwork are owned by Allocationist or its licensors. You may not copy, resell, or commercially reuse our designs or site materials without written permission, except for personal non-commercial use of purchased goods.
9. Disclaimers & liability
The Site is provided “as is.” To the fullest extent permitted by law, Allocationist disclaims warranties of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, and non-infringement. We are not liable for indirect, incidental, or consequential damages. Our aggregate liability related to the Site or an order is limited to the amount you paid for the affected order.
10. Privacy
How we collect and use personal information is described in our Privacy Policy. Essential cookies run the storefront; optional analytics load only with your consent where required.
11. Governing law
These Terms are governed by the laws of the Province of Alberta and the applicable laws of Canada, without regard to conflict-of-law rules. Courts in Alberta have exclusive jurisdiction, subject to mandatory consumer protections that cannot be waived.
12. Contact
Questions about these Terms: info@allocationist.com or via the Contact page.
See also our Privacy Policy.